I actually wen't out to day and let my friend cut my hair, though my mother told me she didn't see a difference then walked away from me. Great for my self confidence right even so I'm doing great today for having gotten out of the house and hanging with people I'm not so sure I'm compatible with, well one person in particular. I think today I'll finish cleaning my room hopefully before Anthonee destroys it again, like he tries to destroy my hope. Why does everyone tend to tell me the low side of everything that makes me happy. I tend to think second thoughts because Aubrey calls me stupid and tells me my plans aren't enough.
Well I'll get to the point, I care just let me put that out there so you know that I care, Aubrey told me today that internet boys are all full of shit and there is no reason for me to trust any of them also Anthonee told me my internet boy just wants to see my tits. Now having heard this I say so what Maybe I like showing my tits, I don't not really, that having been said Anthonee also gave me another piece of advice. "Korina, don't trust guys on the internet if you think there's something there that's all just in your head, hes probably out fucking other girls every night," I can't help but laugh not because it doesn't bother me of course this would, but what am I supposed to say "Sorry internet dude I wont ever let you see my tits ever again and you will never get to touch this snatch if you touch that bitches VAGINA!". This would mean nothing, this be extremely ineffective. (I don't expect anyone to be able to not have sex, well unless your me because I don't really have sex... unless I'm alone...)
Now here comes full blast Nina, I'm not getting sex any ways so there's no problem on my part even if someone did want to sex me up I'm not going to because I guess I'm fucking weird. Now if it does not work out with any internet man of course I'll be sad, in this case extremely because I happen to like this man a lot *cough, cough* (He happens to read this blog and I hate confrontation so I'm not saying anything else considering I am now on edge and I hate HATE sharing my feelings. Please don't make me go to far out side my comfort zone.), so I would force my self to get over myself and fight my mind. Alright so now we are in my mind you will feel the weirdness in my mind after a break up I have three thoughts I must fight myself threw before I except another man into my life;
1) I should for ever give up on men and be with women:
A)They kiss better
B)They are easier for me to understand... sometimes.
C) When it comes to sex they D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E-L-Y know what they are doing.
2) I should become a nun:
A) I know my religion
B) I would never bee hurt by a man again
C) I can be a baker and feed Poor people!
3) I could be A HUGE slut:
A)I would get better at sex
B) I would get sex more often
C) I would meet a lot of new people.
Now that you know what I think I'll give you the only reasons why I say I can't do these things
1) I don't like vag.
2)I could never live with out sex
3)I don't see anything wrong with this...
Just kidding I would never be able to have sex with someone I couldn't ever possibly see a future with because if the next morning they say "Sorry I don't think this will work" I'll think 'Damn and I was really looking forward to bumping up the amount of sex I would get for the next 7-13 months guess every time I have sex its gonna hurt', maybe that was a little to much information.
Considering now you understand me a little bit more considering I indulged on letting a little more of myself out this time, I feel sad that I'm going to post this it feels like I'm afraid of losing some people if they read all of this. I think I'm a big girl and I told myself that I would do this and not care, but I am a girl so thats definitely not ever going to happen. I guess this is like sex I'm putting a peace of me out there not really expecting anything in return.
Well I'll get to the point, I care just let me put that out there so you know that I care, Aubrey told me today that internet boys are all full of shit and there is no reason for me to trust any of them also Anthonee told me my internet boy just wants to see my tits. Now having heard this I say so what Maybe I like showing my tits, I don't not really, that having been said Anthonee also gave me another piece of advice. "Korina, don't trust guys on the internet if you think there's something there that's all just in your head, hes probably out fucking other girls every night," I can't help but laugh not because it doesn't bother me of course this would, but what am I supposed to say "Sorry internet dude I wont ever let you see my tits ever again and you will never get to touch this snatch if you touch that bitches VAGINA!". This would mean nothing, this be extremely ineffective. (I don't expect anyone to be able to not have sex, well unless your me because I don't really have sex... unless I'm alone...)
Now here comes full blast Nina, I'm not getting sex any ways so there's no problem on my part even if someone did want to sex me up I'm not going to because I guess I'm fucking weird. Now if it does not work out with any internet man of course I'll be sad, in this case extremely because I happen to like this man a lot *cough, cough* (He happens to read this blog and I hate confrontation so I'm not saying anything else considering I am now on edge and I hate HATE sharing my feelings. Please don't make me go to far out side my comfort zone.), so I would force my self to get over myself and fight my mind. Alright so now we are in my mind you will feel the weirdness in my mind after a break up I have three thoughts I must fight myself threw before I except another man into my life;
1) I should for ever give up on men and be with women:
A)They kiss better
B)They are easier for me to understand... sometimes.
C) When it comes to sex they D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E-L-Y know what they are doing.
2) I should become a nun:
A) I know my religion
B) I would never bee hurt by a man again
C) I can be a baker and feed Poor people!
3) I could be A HUGE slut:
A)I would get better at sex
B) I would get sex more often
C) I would meet a lot of new people.
Now that you know what I think I'll give you the only reasons why I say I can't do these things
1) I don't like vag.
2)I could never live with out sex
3)I don't see anything wrong with this...
Just kidding I would never be able to have sex with someone I couldn't ever possibly see a future with because if the next morning they say "Sorry I don't think this will work" I'll think 'Damn and I was really looking forward to bumping up the amount of sex I would get for the next 7-13 months guess every time I have sex its gonna hurt', maybe that was a little to much information.
Considering now you understand me a little bit more considering I indulged on letting a little more of myself out this time, I feel sad that I'm going to post this it feels like I'm afraid of losing some people if they read all of this. I think I'm a big girl and I told myself that I would do this and not care, but I am a girl so thats definitely not ever going to happen. I guess this is like sex I'm putting a peace of me out there not really expecting anything in return.
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